This post is vulnerable & scary, but I feel like it’s necessary, too. I wrote on Instagram last night about my need for public accountability & desire to get healthy. I’m making this a blog series as well so that I never forget how hard I worked to reach my goals, big & small!
I can’t count how many times I’ve done this: posted about losing weight, chosen the salad over the burger, went to the gym before going to bed. How many times I’ve declared sticking to Trim Healthy Mama, only to make it through one meal before going off plan. The thing about me is: I have no self discipline. At all. I’m not goal oriented, so I don’t have the mindset of “do whatever it takes to reach that goal.” It’s a flaw that I’m working on fixing, & I’m hoping this is a way to keep me driven! Less about reaching a goal, more about not wanting to fail in front of hundreds of people.
When Sebastian & I first got married, I was right around 238 pounds – maybe even less than that. The spring before, I’d buckled down with some friends & lost over 20 pounds before cracking my tailbone & falling off the wagon. (Side note: do you know how bad a broken tail bone hurts!? It’s been over two years since that happened & I STILL struggle with it!). When we got married in October of 2015, we spent our entire first year of marriage using Postmates. If you don’t know what that is, it’s basically a service that delivers anything you want to you – food being their most popular. They can get you all of the food that doesn’t offer normal delivery. Sooo, for an entire year, we ordered out. I’d say we ate at my parents three or four times a week & ordered through Postmates the other three or four times a week. I can count on one hand how many meals we made at our apartment.
Not only did we waste SO SO SO much money doing this (you buy food, then tax, then a service fee, then a delivery fee, then a tip), but we both gained a ton of weight. I gained over 30 pounds, y’all – THIRTY! When we moved out of our apartment & into my parents for four months while we bought a house, we obviously ate at home a lot more, but the damage had been done!
The house we bought isn’t in a Postmates delivery zone, which we found out shortly after moving in. It’s a major blessing, considering our history, haha! Now, if we want to order out, it has to be pizza or Chinese – he doesn’t like pizza & I don’t like Chinese, so it rarely happens. BUT! We still didn’t eat at home very often. If we weren’t at my parents’ (God bless my mom & dad – I’ve clearly never actually left home :p), we were going through a drive-thru or to our favorite Mexican restaurant. All. The. Time.
A few weeks ago, we went grocery shopping (which we don’t do often). Typically, we buy food that is on the Trim Healthy Mama plan, with intentions of eating the THM way. Instead, that food always went bad & we continued in our old habits. This time, we put THM aside & decided to buy food we know we’d eat, so that we could get in the habit of eating at home before tackling THM. So we got bagels & Raisin Bran & milk for breakfast, sandwich stuff for lunch (which is on plan if you do it the right way), & most of the dinner things we got were on plan. We’ve done a really good job eating at home, & I’ve already lost six pounds just from that.
We got memberships to Planet Fitness & went three times last week, plus walked around Mount Trashmore with friends. Our church is starting a weight loss competition on Sunday, so that will be more motivation!
At the end of the day, I want to get pregnant & I want to be healthy when I do. That is the driving force behind this, & I know that with the Lord, Sebastian & I can both get back on track. We both want a big family, & we both want to be healthy when the Lord gives us a baby.
I’m going to weigh in every week & blog about it on Mondays! I’ll Instastory throughout the week & post my weigh-in on Sundays there. I’m excited & motivated, & while I know I won’t always feel this way, I’m committed to pushing through & making it to my goal weight.
Thanks for following along, & for the kind words & encouragement I’ve received already! 🙂
Starting weight: 261.4
First goal: 238
Second goal: 199
Ultimate goal: 160